Surely, you’ve heard it – stress ruins your sex life. Daily stressors, as minor as traffic jam and queuing for your daily dose of latte, can ultimately take a toll on your sexual desire. But it doesn’t mean that you’re just going to let stress and anxiety have its way in screwing your fun and your relationship, right?
There are still things you can do to get around this. After all, you don’t want stress to deprive you of whatever pleasure you have left in this world, which of course, includes sex. Of course, the best cure for loss of sex drive due to stress is to reduce the tension.
But that’s not always possible. People just react to things that happen to them. And we can’t control how we respond to these things most of the time. We just don’t accept stressors and flush them out of our systems. It takes time before we’re able to accept them and move on with a less heavy heart. In this case, how do we still enjoy sex despite the daily stress that we always find ourselves in?
Here are 5 ways you can still have great sex despite being stressed:
1. Proper breathing
Breathing properly is vital to reach an orgasm. By doing so, you’re enhancing your blood flow, sexual receptiveness, and sensations. So, before you have sex, perform diaphragmatic breathing to help you have a soothing feeling.
To do this, lie on your back and make sure your knees are bent and your feet are flat. Release all your thoughts as you take a breath through your nose and out of your mouth. Afterwards, place one hand on your abdomen and concentrate on your stomach rising and falling.
2. More foreplay
A quickie during sex is the most expedient solution, but it won’t be fully satisfying, which defies the purpose of having sex in the first place. Instead, you can spend some relaxing and intimate time together before having sex. For example, you can give each other’s massage.
You can also take a hot shower together. But don’t look at these as some sort of a pre-sex routine. Relaxing together and making that the focus of your attention can help lessen the tension. This way, the sensation you’ll feel later during sex becomes more profound.
3. Get active
After a stressful day, you get the strong urge to spend your time after work in front of the television while lazing on the couch for hours. This may relieve you of the tension, but that relief doesn’t last for long as physical inactivity only worsens your stress. Instead, you can spend your post-work going for a short walk outside. Doing so will get your heart all pumped up, which increases your energy levels. Of course, you need energy to get in the mood for sex.
4. Concentrate on what feels great
It’s not possible to just shut your mind from all the things that bother you. The good news is that you can still teach yourself to work on your sensations rather than think about that loan in the bank that’s taking too much time to get approved. Studies show that training to be mindful during sex, which allows you to focus on the sensations rather than your worries, can awaken your sexual desire and help you sustain it.
5. Make a schedule
Sex seems hot when it’s spontaneous, but who are we kidding? With the busy lives people lead these days, the only spontaneity we get is using the stairs to reach your office on the 25th floor because the elevators have malfunctioned.
Setting the day when to have sex can actually help you focus on it because you’ve allotted that particular day as your sort of “me time”.